Great Quotes - Funny Quotes - Love Quotes
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Letter "F" » Funny
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«When women are depressed, they eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. It's a whole different way of thinking.»
«When your IQ rises to 28, sell.»
«When the authorities warn you of the dangers of having sex, there is an important lesson to be learned. Do not have sex with the authorities.»
Author: Matt Groening
(Cartoonist)
| About:
Authority,
Funny,
Sex
| Keywords:
authorities, dangers, have sex, lesson, The Warning, warn
«When you feel neglected, think of the female salmon, who lays 3,000,000 eggs but no one remembers her on Mother's Day»
«When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room.»
Author: Woody Allen
(Actor, Author, Film Director, Screenwriter)
| About:
Funny
| Keywords:
kidnapped, rented, renting, rents, rent out, snapped, snapping, snaps, snap at
«When I was young, I said to God, 'God, tell me the mystery of the universe.' But God answered, 'That knowledge is for me alone.' So I said, 'God, tell me the mystery of the peanut.' Then God said, 'Well George, that's more nearly your size.' And he told me.»
«Where lipstick is concerned, the important thing is not color, but to accept God's final word on where your lips end.»
«When your bank account is so overdrawn that it is positively photographic, steps must be taken.»
Author: Dorothy Parker
(Poet, Writer)
| About:
Bankers and banks,
Funny,
Money
| Keywords:
account, bank, bank account, photographic, positively, steps
«Who are you going to believe, me or your own eyes?»
«Why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only food: frequently there must be a beverage.»
Author: Woody Allen
(Actor, Author, Film Director, Screenwriter)
| About:
Food,
Funny
| Keywords:
beverage, beverages, food, frequently, kills
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