Great Quotes - Funny Quotes - Love Quotes
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Letter "F" » Funny
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«Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life.»
«Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us.»
Author: Calvin & Hobbes
| About:
Funny
| Keywords:
and elsewhere, contact, elsewhere, intelligent, intelligent life, surest, tried
«Sometimes I lie awake at night, and ask, 'Where have I gone wrong?' Then a voice says to me, 'This is going to take more than one night.'»
«Sometimes the only way you can feel good about yourself is by making someone else look bad. And I'm tired of making other people feel good about themselves.»
«Shit is the tofu of cursing.»
Author: David Sedaris
| About:
Funny
«Some people have the time but they don't have time while others have time but do not have the time.»
«Sometimes I'm so sweet even I can't stand it.»
«Skiing: I do not participate in any sport with ambulances at the bottom of the hill»
Author: Erma Bombeck
| About:
Funny,
Ski
| Keywords:
ambulance, ambulances, at the bottom, hill, participate, ski, skiing, skis, the Hill
«Sometimes I wake up and I think I should start wearing a beret, but I don't do it. One day I'm gonna, though. You bet your ass, I will have a beret on. That's ridiculous, but it's true. I always fight with wearing a beret.»
Author: Mitch Hedberg
(Comedian)
| About:
Fashion,
Funny,
Self-Awareness
| Keywords:
ass, beret, bet, ridiculous, wake up, wearing, you bet
«Sometimes I wave to people I don't know. It's very dangerous to wave to someone you don't know, because what if they don't have a hand? They'll think you're cocky. 'Look what I got... This thing is useful. I'm gonna go pick somethin' up.'»
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