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Letter "G" » George Carlin Quotes
«I've never had a 10, but one night I had five twos»
Author: George Carlin (Actor, Author, Comedian) | Keywords: five, twos
«Excuse me, officer, but would you mind bringing the wreckage a little closer this way? My wife can't see»
«If a man smiles all the time, he's probably selling something that doesn't work»
Author: George Carlin (Actor, Author, Comedian) | About: Smile | Keywords: all the time, selling, smiles
«Dusting is a good example of the futility of trying to put things right. As soon as you dust, the fact of your next dusting has already been established.»
«Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.»
«In labor news, longshoremen walked off the piers today; rescue operations are continuing»
«In comic strips, the person on the right always speaks first.»
«Little-known fact: When the stock exchange closes, the guy who comes out on the balcony with that big hammer slams it on the head of the person who lost the most money that day»
«I think it would be interesting if old people got anti-Alzheimer's disease where they slowly began to recover other people's lost memories.»
«Comedy is a socially acceptable form of hostility and aggression. That is what comics do, stand the world upside down.»

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