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Letter "D" » Dave Barry Quotes
«If, in reading the following pages, you are uncertain as to whether a specific statement is meant seriously or not, simply apply this rule of thumb: If the statement makes you consider filing a lawsuit, I was kidding.»
«The only really good place to buy lumber is at a store where the lumber has already been cut and attached together in the form of furniture, finished, and put inside boxes.»
Author: Dave Barry (Humorist, Writer) | Keywords: boxes, furniture, lumber
«A gene can be either dominant or recessive, depending on which type of gene it is.»
«The nuclear generator of brain sludge is television.»
Author: Dave Barry (Humorist, Writer) | About: Television | Keywords: generator, nuclear, sludge
«What I want to know is: Why is it important to have visible stomach muscles? I grew up in an era (the Paleolithic) when people kept their stomach muscles discreetly out of sight.»
«The major parties could conduct live human sacrifices on their podiums during prime time, and I doubt that anybody would notice.»
«And so by the fifteenth century, on October 8, the Europeans were looking for a new place to try to get to, and they came up with a new concept: the West.»
«Today, of course, it is considered very poor taste to use the F-word except in major motion pictures.»
«I've noticed that one thing about parents is that no matter what stage your child is in, the parents who have older children always tell you the next stage is worse.»
«Rembrandt's first name was Beauregard, which is why he never used it.»
Author: Dave Barry (Humorist, Writer) | Keywords: first name, Rembrandt

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