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Letter "B" » Billy Connolly Quotes
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«?So, have you heard about the oyster who went to a disco and pulled a mussel??»
Author: Billy Connolly
(Actor)
«The human race has been set up. Someone, somewhere, is playing a practical joke on us. Apparently, women need to feel loved to have sex. Men need to have sex to feel loved. How do we ever get started?»
Author: Billy Connolly
(Actor)
| Keywords:
apparently, get started, have sex, human race, joke, playing, play a joke on, practical, practical joke, set up, started
«I worry about ridiculous things, you know, how does a guy who drives a snowplough get to work in the morning. . . . That can keep me awake for days..»
Author: Billy Connolly
(Actor)
| Keywords:
drives, get to, How does, ridiculous, snowplough, work in
«Never trust a man, who when left alone with a tea cosey... Doesn't try it on.»
«It seems to me that Islam and Christianity and Judaism all have the same god, and he's telling them all different things.»
Author: Billy Connolly
(Actor)
«Marriage is a wonderful invention: then again, so is a bicycle repair kit.»
«There are two seasons in Scotland: June and winter.»
«I don't believe in angels and I have trouble with the whole God thing. I don't want to say I don't believe in God, but I don't think I do. But I believe in people who do.»
Author: Billy Connolly
(Actor)
«What always staggers me is that when people blow their noses, they always look into their hankies to see what came out. What do they expect to find?»
Author: Billy Connolly
(Actor)
| Keywords:
came out, look into, noses, stagger, staggered, staggering, staggers
«I've always wanted to go to Switzerland to see what the army does with those wee red knives.»
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