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Letter "A" » Ambrose Bierce Quotes
«POTABLE, n. Suitable for drinking. Water is said to be potable; indeed, some declare it our natural beverage, although even they find it palatable only when suffering from the recurrent disorder known as thirst, for which it is a medicine. Upon nothing has so great and diligent ingenuity been brought to bear in all ages and in all countries, except the most uncivilized, as upon the invention of substitutes for water. To hold that this general aversion to that liquid has no basis in the preservative instinct of the race is to be unscientific --and without science we are as the snakes and toads.»
«POVERTY, n. A file provided for the teeth of the rats of reform. The number of plans for its abolition equals that of the reformers who suffer from it, plus that of the philosophers who know nothing about it. Its victims are distinguished by possession of all the virtues and by their faith in leaders seeking to conduct them into a prosperity where they believe these to be unknown.»
«PRECEDENT, n. In Law, a previous decision, rule or practice which, in the absence of a definite statute, has whatever force and authority a Judge may choose to give it, thereby greatly simplifying his task of doing as he pleases. As there are precedents for everything, he has only to ignore those that make against his interest and accentuate those in the line of his desire. Invention of the precedent elevates the trial-at-law from the low estate of a fortuitous ordeal to the noble attitude of a dirigible arbitrament.»
«PRECIPITATE, adj. Anteprandial.Precipitate in all, this sinner Took action first, and then his dinner. --Judibras»
«RECONCILIATION, n. A suspension of hostilities. An armed truce for the purpose of digging up the dead.»
«Aborigines, n.: Persons of little worth found cumbering the soil of a newly discovered country. They soon cease to cumber; they fertilize.»
«DISABUSE, v.t. The present your neighbor with another and better error than the one which he has deemed it advantageous to embrace.»
«JEWS-HARP, n. An unmusical instrument, played by holding it fast with the teeth and trying to brush it away with the finger.»
«A cat is a soft, indestructible automaton provided by nature to be kicked when things go wrong in the domestic circle.»
«PRUDE, n. A bawd hiding behind the back of her demeanor.»

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